21 day love challenge

The other morning my 13 year old son informed me “You didn’t come and kiss me goodnight last night.” It was true, I had been tired and finally sat down on the couch and it just seemed too hard to get up. I did, on my way to bed pat his sleeping head, but obviously that does not count, he didn’t know it was happening.

Actions and love go together and I find children are great at making this known. Actions speak louder than words – not to underestimate words either. In positive psychology they talk about love as being the strongest emotion. It is something that everyone needs to survive.

Photo credit: hdnextyear.com

Photo credit: hdnextyear.com


I was reading Hands Free Mama and felt very challenged by the end of it! A story is told where her daughter is waiting for her to come say goodnight and even though her Mum is meeting deadlines she stops and goes – her daughter had told her Grandma that “Mama always comes”.

Hands Free Mama then poses a 21 day love challenge:

Why Choose Love

Tackle an extra hour of paperwork or love?
I choose love.
I will be more productive after taking a much needed break.

Scream at the driver who just cut me off or love?
I choose love.
It will be better for my blood pressure as well as the ears in the backseat.

Read a text message at the stoplight or love?
I choose love.
It could save my life, my loved ones’ lives, and spare me from taking a life.

Hold a grudge or love?
I choose love.
Let resentment be someone else’s life-long companion.

Say ‘I can’t play with you’ or love?
I choose love.
Seeing her smile as she sets up the game board fills me with a sense of peace I can’t find anywhere else.

Get in the last word or love?
I choose love.
Our words will be better heard when we both cool down.

Rant about the spilled milk carton or love?
I choose love.
Spills can be cleaned up; broken hearts are harder to mend.

Post a picture of this moment to social media or love?
I choose love.
I will remember it more vividly if I capture this moment solely with my eyes.

Complain about the way she’s dressed or love?
I choose love.
I will encourage her to shine her unique light and be herself by loving her “as is.”

Berate myself for messing up or love?
I choose love.
Accepting my humanness offers my precious ones the freedom to be human too.

Today I will choose love.
Tomorrow I will choose love.
And the day after that, I will choose love.
If I mistakenly choose distraction, perfection, or negativity over love, I will not wallow in regret. I will choose love next.
I will choose love until it becomes my first response … my gut instinct … my natural reaction.
I will choose love until it becomes who I am.

My friends, consider the possibilities for a moment: What might result if love becomes your default choice for 21 straight days? What opportunities might open up? What connections might be repaired? What moments might you grasp that otherwise might be missed? Who might you become?

Instead of

The One Who’s Always Too Busy
The One Who Overreacts
The One Who Never Listens
The One Who Rarely Slows Down
The One Who Always Looks Miserable
The One Glued to the Phone
The One Missing All the Fun
The One Who’s Given Up

You might just become The One You Always Wanted to Be …

A Listener
A Hugger
A Forgiver
A Take Your Timer
A Belly Laugher
A Risk Taker
A Silly Grinner
A Moment Grasper
A Liver of Life

Why? Because good things start with love.

Just show up to love today.
Don’t worry about what you look like or what yesterday looked like.
Just show up to love.
Something tells me you’ll walk away a little better than when you arrived.

Then do it again.

Photo Credit: dreamstime.com

Photo Credit: dreamstime.com


I want to give the challenge a go. I am thankful for the reminder to choose love. How about you?


5 thoughts on “21 day love challenge

  1. I feel exhausted so often , that these challenges seem impossible to me. How do I respond then? Am I to ignore the pricked conscience and the wise words about loving and listening and taking time instead of being the one who is always too busy and tired? I know what I want to be. I know what my reality is though, with 7 children and doing it on my own…but they need me more then…yes even the grown up ones…how should I respond? I ask myself this so often. It would be a sad day to have got them all through to adulthood, paid the bills, but they remember me as tired and miserable. So…I take on one day or one hour at a time. I make the best decision I can, under the Gracious hand of God, in that moment, and then all I can do with the massive gaps that remain is to entrust my children to their Heaveny Father and pray for His mercy to carry them when I just can’t. But, let me not give up trying to be the loving and kind mother they need. Let the knowledge of the power of love transform my negativity to hope and a positive outlook that is not just a brave face, but a new reality.


  2. I sooo love what you have shared. Thank you for making a conversation of the blog. I did not want to in any way lay a burden of love for people, I wanted to encourage others to be mindful of love and the actions. I agree sometimes – often, we can only take each hour, each moment as it comes and trust God in knowing that He loves our kids even more than we do. I agree, some of the things listed just seem impossible especially when we are all in different situations. The Hands Free Mama has 2 kids – that makes a big difference in the way she parents.
    Given all this, I love the way you finished your comment
    “Let the knowledge of the power of love transform my negativity to hope and a positive outlook that is not just a brave face, but a new reality.”
    Amen sister! May you know the strength, energy and love of Christ as he fills your heart. Blessings. R xx


  3. Wow this is great Rebekah. So easy to do and such a powerful way to impact. I’ll be using this in one of my devotions. Hope you are all going well xx


    • We have all enjoyed a good start to the year. I’m glad you enjoyed this blog and that you can use it! Hope you have had a great start. Love R xx


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